Smells Like Teen Spirit

It is with great regret that the PO notes the passing, today, April 7th 2006, of the Boy Wonder's childhood.

For the next seven years, the BW's time will be devoted to the following activities :

1. Being surly
2. Grunting incomprehensibly in response to any questions or remarks addressed to him
3. Being misunderstood
4. Railing against an unfair world
5. Rebelling against authority
6. Disowning his parents
7. Experimenting in illicit substances
8. Experiencing existential angst
9. Not washing
10. Oversleeping
11. Leaving half-eaten food and unwashed dishes under furniture
12. Listening to loud music
13. Having his heart broken, repeatedly
14. Obsessing
15. Reading Camus and Harper Lee
16. Writing poetry
17. Playing in rock bands

Naturally, neither the PO nor the Mother Superior - nor, for that matter, Missy, the Surfer Dude, the Recluse, the Principal, the Hip Granny, the Laughing Buddha, the Mad Professor, My Favourite Aunt, or any of the American Cousins - will be able to help the BW during this period, or understand what he is going through, as none of them has ever actually been a teenager.

The PO looks forward to re-establishing contact with the BW in April 2013.